Overused tropes, dialect disasters, and cringe-worthy acting — these are some of the worst westerns to defile the silver screen.
Under normal circumstances, the C&I crew adheres to a time-tested adage: If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. In the case of these five westerns, some pretty major fixes are in order. Here are five westerns that, try as they might, didn't hit the mark.
Stagecoach (1939)
The disreputable doctor who cracks wise and drinks heavily, the golden-haired shady lady, the shifty-eyed gambler with a gun at his side, and, of course, the square-jawed, slow-talking gunfighter. These familiar figures had already established themselves as archetypes by 1939. However, director John Ford still managed to screw this one up, even with a foundation of tropes plainly laid out for him.
APRIL FOOLS!
You didn’t really think we were going to trash these iconic films, did you? Whether it hits the mark or not, a western is a western, and we’re here to appreciate them all! Stagecoach is actually ranked first on our list of 100 best westerns ever made. Here are the rest of our top five FAVORITE westerns.
The Searchers (1956)
John Wayne gives one of his finest and most complex performances in John Ford’s enduringly popular and influential western as Ethan Edwards, a former Confederate soldier who’s obsessively driven to recover his beloved niece after her family is killed and she is abducted by marauding Comanches. For years, he continues his search, accompanied by Marty (Jeffrey Hunter), a “half-breed” orphan raised to adulthood by Ethan’s brother. And as they continue, however, Marty comes to question Ethan’s fanaticism, and the movie itself offers a darkly powerful counterpoint to the reassuring clichés of standard-issue horse operas. Even after six decades, Ford’s film seems fresh and vital as it undermines audience assumptions about what to expect from westerns in general and “a John Wayne movie” in particular.
Shane (1953)
If you define a classic film as one that most people automatically assume they’ve seen, even if they haven’t, because so many other movies have reprised its basic plot, then director George Stevens’ Shane certainly qualifies for that label. Alan Ladd stars to perfection as Shane, a mysterious gunfighter who providentially appears in a Wyoming community just when the clash between homesteaders and cattle ranchers is turning uglier and bloodier. Truth to tell, Shane would like to put away his guns, and put down some roots with a farming family. But a seriously mean galoot named Jack Wilson (Jack Palance in a career-defining performance) forces him to do, however reluctantly, what he’s got to do.
My Darling Clementine (1946)
With all due respect to admirers of Tombstone and Gunfight at the O.K. Corral — both worthy films that appear later on this list — John Ford’s unforgettable drama remains in a class by itself as a cinematic account of the legendary shootout involving Wyatt Earp (Henry Fonda), Doc Holliday (Victor Mature), and the Clanton clan (led by a startlingly vicious Walter Brennan). As critic Roger Ebert noted, “My Darling Clementine must be one of the sweetest and most good-hearted of all westerns. The giveaway is the title, which is not about Wyatt or Doc or the gunfight, but about Clementine [played by Cathy Downs], certainly the most important thing to happen to Marshal Earp during the story.”
The Magnificent Seven (1960)
Another sign of a classic: Whenever it pops up during a channel surf, you can’t turn it off. In this case whether it’s near the beginning, when Yul Brynner recruits his titular team of mercenaries, or when the seven ride into the Mexican village they’re hired to protect, to the pulse-quickening “Bomp-BUMP-Bump-Bomp” of Elmer Bernstein’s score, or at the film’s climax during the crackerjack shootout with the vicious raiders led by the demonic Calvera (Eli Wallach), you simply must keep watching. Whereas the previous four films on this list are justly lauded as cinematic art, The Magnificent Seven has no pretentions other than to being the ultimate cowboy popcorn movie.
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